Monday, April 28, 2008
had my emath P2 and pure geog P1 today. both papers were relatively okay. geog was such a happy paper. i was like "yay!" when i saw the questions, and after the paper.
then after i step out of the auditorium and walked out of school... i don't know. i just felt like crying. i just felt... very down. and the best part, i have no idea why.
in the afternoon, i suddenly got the weird clammy feeling again. i hadn't had the feeling for quite some time. i was scared - really scared - for someone. again, i have absolutely no idea why.
i had a strong feeling to rush up to you, hold you tight, comfort you and cry in your place. from what or why, i don't know. but that's the persistent feeling the whole time.i'm trying all my best to make sense of everything - what happened, what didn't happen, our fight, our situation etc.
but i don't know if i'm capable to take on all of this on my own.
but then, i have to. every other person just tells me not to think about it, shelve the whole issue. easy for them to say, because 1) they're not me and 2) i bet they're sick of it.
people have others to help them guide their way along when they're lost.
i guide others, no problem. but in this sort of thing, i'm somehow left on my own.
i don't know. i'm so tired.
i think i've lost it.
11:35 pm
