Saturday, August 02, 2008
as noted, i changed my jukebox from For The Record to Thanx 4 Nothin. i was contemplating whether to put in Last Kiss, It's Like That, Heat or Thanx 4 Nothin before settling for the latter. and according to some youtube viewers, Thanx 4 Nothin is sort of a prelude to For The Record. one thing i like about MC is that some of her songs are coherently arranged. she did that for some of her MVs for Emancipation of Mimi, and she did it again for her tracks in E=MC2.
anyway, it's finally the end of the week. the only two subjects that i recalled actually listening in/studying today was amath and chem. which is bad, considering that i took almost 3 hours to try and complete one of the amath practice papers. sighs. there's this mutual disunity between me and maths.
after chem remedial, went to pray before hitting LJS for a very late lunch (or was it tea-time?) at about 4 plus. the stomach was hurting since..well, 1.15. but i guess once in a while it's okay to operate on an empty stomach.
but the whole time after school, for some reason you were in my mind. i realised that i'm actually scared about a lot of things. my prelims. my Os. my future.and also, if you completely leave my life. if that happens... i can live, but i won't be alive.yes, i'm loving the way the schoolweek ends - i got to see you for three days straight. i finally got to hear your voice, your laugh. see your smile. inhale your scent. exchange smses. i cherish every single waking moment that i'm with you.but as i see how fast the days are passing, i just get scared because i know what it all spells. i'm trying very hard to make the most of whatever time that we could possibly have, no matter is it 2 minutes or 2 hours.i love you, but i'm just scared. people say they respect me for the way i love you. but deep down, i don't feel that way - i'm too scared about all this. i don't even know what to do when the time comes - or if i can even pluck the courage when the time comes.i guess it's true when they say that loving is never easy. but when you're unsure about what to do but completely sure about how you feel, that's when it hurts too much.
1:12 am
